Friday Top Ten: Music to listen to with your kids that won’t make your ears bleed

One of the toughest things for aging hipster dufus parents like myself is to sit idly by and watch your kids commit all kinds of musical crimes against humanity as they get older. When they are much younger they will pretty much listen to anything you want them to, but after a while they start to develop their own tastes, and the absolute worst thing you can do is to criticize what they are listening to, otherwise the youth rebellion gene kicks in and they are doubling down on anything you say sounds like an auto-tuned dying cat. There are a few songs, however, that still bridge the divide between their budding tastes and all that is good and righteous in the musical world. Here’s a baker’s dozen of them that carrying the JLo stamp of approval for you to try out on your own youngsters. There’s not a Voice contestant nor desperate former Mouskateer/Disney Channel starlet to be found. (Note: My kids are both boys, so this list has a definite Halloween/ghost/zombie/pirate bent to it. Feel free to adjust as needed, and to repurpose as a Halloween playlist as necessary.)

Organ Donor – DJ Shadow: Four out of five dentists agree, kids love DJ Shadow. (And dance music, though I wouldn’t call what either of them do when this song comes on dance music by any stretch of the imagination.)

Werewolves of London – Warren Zevon: What can I say, it’s a lot of fun to howl when listening to this and riding in the car. They also laugh uncontrollably at the fact that my name is mentioned in the lyrics, but they are really easily entertained.

Ghost Town – The Specials: See, a theme developing here? I don’t care why, getting another generation of kids listening to The Specials is totally worth it, regardless of the reason why.

Dashboard – Modest Mouse: I’d like to think they love this song because they recognize the genius of Johnny Marr’s guitar playing, but I’m pretty sure it is because it has an awesome beat and a video with fish creatures.

Harder Better Faster Stronger – Daft Punk: Even the fifth dentist agrees that kids love Daft Punk. It’s unanimous and undeniable.

Bad – U2: Another song you can howl at. I don’t think the fact that it is U2’s best song by a longshot even factors in one iota.

Ghost N Stuff – Deadmau5: It’s a slightly spook ghost themed dance track. That = 100% fired gold as far as my kids are concerned. Plus, they dig the whole mouse head thing.

Bicycle Race – Queen: I think they just enjoy shouting “BI-cycle, Bi-cycle!” at me when I got out to ride. Regardless, it’s an excuse to listen to Freddie Mercury so I’m down with that.

I Killed Sally’s Lover – The Avett Brothers: What? Should I be concerned that they love a song about going off and grabbing your shotgun and blade because Sally is cheating on you with another man? Hmmm, maybe you’re right. May need to rethink this one, but then again, that would wipe out the majority of Johnny Cash’s catalogue.

Gangster Trippin’ – Fat Boy Slim: That hook is undeniable. No surprise here.

Knock ’em Out – Lily Allen: I do love me some Lily Rose Allen, but again I like to fool myself into thinking that they are attracted by the awesome Professor Longhair piano riff and not the hilarious “get out my face” lyrics.

Redemption Song – Joe Strummer: Everyone is powerless in the presence of Joe Strummer’s awesomeness. What, you think they just like the fact that it mentions pirates? Dang, I think you’re right.

As always, here it is in handy Spotify playlist form for your listening/subscribing pleasure. Now go forth and wow your kids with your hipness.

Cheers.